Creating this blog was something I wanted to do for you. I wanted to write my memories of you so that one day I can share them with you. I have these visions of you reading these letters and falling in love with them. You love them so much that you will turn to me and ask, with joyful tears in your eyes, if you could share them with your classmates during Show-and-Tell. (Note to self: buy a "World's Greatest Mom" mug NOW!) There is also this nagging side of me that suspects you will find the stories, pictures, and videos posted on this site totally embarrassing. Since it is likely that I will embarrass you throughout your childhood and teen years, I have decided to press on. Please forgive me! (Note to self: cancel order for the mug until later date.)
It only seems fitting that my first post should tell you about the night I found out that I was pregnant. After all, that is where it all begins.
Your Daddy and I had been trying to conceive since February and it was now September. Sure, there are plenty of couples that wait for months, even years, to conceive; but to us, those 7 months felt like FOREVER! There was a time or two that we thought we were pregnant only to be disappointed. So, when I was late in September, I didn't allow myself to get excited. (I will explain the term "late" to you on your wedding day. Until then, don't ask.) After two weeks passed and I was still late, I decided to take a home pregnancy test.
It was a Thursday night. Daddy and I had just finished dinner when I announced that I was going to go take a pregnancy test while he did the dishes. You see, Daddy and I have this deal - I cook and he cleans. It is a wickedly awesome agreement that I love. So, I went to the bathroom to pee on a stick. "Don't get excited. Don't get excited," was my mantra during the test. After peeing, I put the test on the back of the toilet - on top of a wod of Kleenex, of course! Just laying it on the toilet is just plain GROSS! Anywho - while I waited for the 3 minutes that it takes for the test to work, I decided to brush my teeth. For someone as impatient as me, 3 minutes is too long. With toothpaste foam still in my mouth, I peeked at the test. Much to my joy, it said "Pregnant". I could have choked.
Quickly I spit and grabbed the test and ran into the Living Room. Once I saw Daddy standing at the sink with suds everywhere all I could do was drop to my knees and mumble, "It's says 'Pregnant'." "Mumble" is the best word here because I literally couldn't talk. Daddy and I just hugged and giggled, but then decided to do the responsible thing and take another test, just to be sure.
However, I just could not pee. Even after drinking 3 glasses of water, I could only get a few tiny drops on the testing strip. I wasn't surprised that after 3 minutes the test gave me an error message. So, Daddy and I jumped into the car, drove around the corner to the little Neighborhood Wal-Mart, and bought another box of tests.
While standing in line at Wal-mart I felt an urge that I have now, after almost 6 months, come very accustomed to feeling. It was the urge to PEE, not just pee, but PEE. I had to PEE so bad that I feared my eyeballs would float away from my face. On the drive home, I tore into the packaging (Darn things are WAY hard to open, by the way) and then ran to the bathroom to pee.
Daddy and I decided that if the test was pregnancy-positive then we would call our parents. We were even holding our phones while we waited. Those 3 minutes felt like an eternity. Once "Pregnant" popped onto the screen, I ran into what will be your room and called my Mom (Your Grandmother, who, by the way, doesn't have a Grandma name yet. She is letting you name her. No pressure!!) Even though it was about 11:00 EST and I KNEW what she was doing because she was probably doing the exact same thing that 90% of the people living on the East Coast were doing, I still stupidly asked "What are you doing?" I don't think I waited for an answer. I just blurted out in a single breath, "I-just-took-2-pregnancy-tests-and-they-both-said-pregnant-so-I-am-having-a-baby!"
We then talked for a while about what to do next. I was ready to go shopping for little, tiny things right then and there. I didn't care what time it was or how early I would have to wake-up for work. She suggested that I call my doctor in the morning to make an appointment to confirm things. After talking for about 10 minutes, I felt that urge again - the urge to PEE. Not wanting to end the conversation, I took another test while talking. (I am one talented lady! And yes, I did tell her what I was doing.) The test said "Pregnant" and I was still just as surprised as the first time. Daddy and I barely slept that night.
About a week later, I went to the doctor. He had me do a pee test (Shocking!) and ultrasound. Daddy and I saw your tiny blinking heart. All I could do was giggle at the monitor. I had wanted you to come along for so long. In that one moment, my heart was so full of love for you.
So, after 3 positive home pregnancy tests, 1 test with an error, a doctor's visit, and an ultrasound showing a tiny blinking dot, I learned that my life was about to change in ways I could not imagine.
Thank you.
Love,
Mommy
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